Sleep news

Since the clocks went back (forward?, I can't remember) in October, Abbie's been taking 2 hours or more long naps in the afternoon, extending way beyond her previous 1 hourish nap times. I thought that the darker, colder days, and perhaps an intense period of development, meant that she needed the sleep to lay down whatever new things she's learning, so didn't interfere. Not to mention that getting that much time to myself in the day was pretty amazing (especially given I was in first trimester big fatigue state at the time). Unfortunately, this had a knock on effect of her playing up at bed time, alot of the excuses were to do with nappies, needing a drink, anything really to get some attention away from the fact that she should be in bed! Our evenings went from dinner, bath, bed by 6.30pm and evenings to ourselves, to dinner, bath, and bed, but no actual sleeping until anytime between 7 and 10pm (with lots of trips up and down the stairs in the meantime, eating separate evening meals, just like old times). After a few months of this and lots of trial and error, we have finally worked out and fixed things. RELIEF. Thought this may be useful.

The first step was to rule out a few other reasons: 1. Colder nights - she now has a 9 tog cot bed duvet and pillow rather than the much thinner and smaller duvet/pillow set we got from ikea; we also make sure she wears a vest under her pyjamas, and 2: Eczema - she complained of an itchy back and after a trip to the doctor's surgery and a big pot of diprobase, the rash on her back has cleared making things much more comfortable at night (I think I was being a bit overzealous with the laundry bleach on the whites so have stopped using that too). However, the messing around still continued. I was hesitant to interrupt Abbie's sleep, not wanting to go against something that seemed to be needed for her - I only had to experience her going without a nap to know how much difference it made (mostly days when she spent at friend's houses playing with their children and not wanting to sleep - the day usually descended into chaos, where she didn't know what she was doing). Maybe she needed the sleep in the day because of the rapid learning that goes on in little toddler brains and it couldn't wait until night time? I don't like to interfere with natural processes.

The difficulty Abbie was having doing something that had been straightforward since she moved into her own room from 6 months was hard to experience and just didn't make sense. We'd taken the sides off her cot bed in August and no problems with that transition either.

After a weekend visiting my grandparents, where on the first day, no afternoon nap was possible, apart from a 20 min power one in the car, things started clicking. That evening, instead of bedtime dragging out til later 7-7.30pm (I had thought that leaving it til later would help), she had dinner at her previously usual routine of 5pmish, bath after that and bed and story at 6-6.30pm. And we had peace all evening! Wow! The same happened the next night, again, with a short midday sleep in the car. Interestingly, the previously mentioned toddler/mums no-nap social days also included a nap on the way home at about 4pm, but they were not providing the same effect. Clearly the combination of a day of over stimulation and no resting until it was too late was no good.

I started offering Abbie an afternoon nap at home, but leaving it if she didn't want to, and waking her after an hour if she did. I also did the same with falling asleep on car journeys - letting her sleep but just watching the time. I'm also more aware of the need for quiet, calm time in the day, and that crazy days aren't nice for her, not to overload her. I try to look out for signs of overstimulation and tiredness and go home earlier if she needs it.

I didn't want to count my chickens, so have waited until now to write, but since introducing the changes in the past month, sleeping is much simpler for everyone... and sleep she does. Phew.

Useful links found since: How sleep works (for parents of toddlers) and Understanding your toddler's sleep